Two years ago I got married to the one woman who could actually make me happy. Two years ago I gained a kind of happiness I never thought I’d had. Two years ago.

You saved me from a life of agony and despair, you gave me hope, love, and so much more. I love you with all my heart, and with all my soul.

I wish there was a way to show you just how much you mean to me, but it would require the world to unite as one, the heavens to be opened, and the music to never stop playing.

All I can do right now is pray that one day I can provide for you the life that you deserve, for less stressful times to start, and more relaxing times to begin.

I love you baby, always and forever.

Paperwork sucks, few will disagree. I will not bore you with every little detail, but suffice to say they kept us busy, mentally as well. We’ve made calls to plots of places, because damn near everyone said something different regarding the whole procedure; the proper way to get a permit to stay in the Netherlands beyond the 3-month limit.

We were very worried that someone would tell us the wrong information about what we should or should not do and consequently get denied their permits because of that. Initially we were told (through the IND website as well) that they were supposed to see the ‘foreigners police’ within 3 days of arrival, but when I called them they said they didn’t have to.

We obtained the permit application forms and proceeded to fill those in to the best of our ability. It was a little confusing at times as some of the questions on it almost felt like trick questions. This was especially the case with the questions regarding our daughter. While my wife took extra care to get papers that gave her permission to take her out of the country ‘n such. The sheer possibility they’d approve my wife, but not our kid was a scary thought.

Once completed, with copies added ‘n stuff, we had to go over to the IND to submit the applications. We expected to be called into a little office where some guy would go over every single entry, but that was not the case. Instead, we just got a number and had to wait for it to be our turn and head to the desk where a young man was sitting at. He then proceeded to go over it briefly, adding numbers and data from the forms into his computer. He asked for a few papers he wanted to make copies of, which he then added to their files. He also wanted recent mugshot photos, which apparently we had overlooked in the forms. He was kind enough to let us go to the nearby market to make some and return with them afterward.

He then pasted a sticker in both their passports which gave them a temporary permit for up to 6 months. (So they don’t have to leave the country while the decision is made if their standard tourist visa expires.) If a decision was not made within those 6 months they’d get a new sticker for 3 additional months, and again if not made in those 3 months they get a final stickers for yet another 3 months. The decision simply has to be made within that time.

So then we played the waiting game once again, but the wait wasn’t as long as we feared. When we got the notices from them, we nervously opened the letters and it said.. approved! w00t! It also said we’d get another notice later to pick up the permit cards, as they were put into the queue to get printed I guess. We got that notice a lil’ while after and headed over to the IND again to pick ‘m up. This process took mere minutes and made them legal to stay for up to a year. They simply have to reapply before that year is up, but that time it won’t cost as much, plus they already got the information they needed, so I’m not too scared about that.

So now that they’re perfectly legal we got my wife a bank account, are applying for an extra income plus checking for additional benefits I can apply for. So there’s still more paperwork to be done, but the scariest part is over.

After a few days of waiting in agony, the time had finally come for my wife and kid to fly all the way over here. Of course nothing ever goes truly easy with us, so it was a grueling wait in the hours I had zero contact with them. Not to mention the fact I had to have them board a plane from Polish airlines. I was almost expecting a 50 year old wooden plane that had to be towed toward the runway, then ejected into the air by slingshot!

My biggest fear though, was of them getting stuck at customs. After my last experience with them I have been very paranoid about that. Long story short, I await them at the airport and all turned out well. Apart from a big suitcase with most of Sha’s clothing getting lost, so she had to fill out some stupid form. It did show up a few days later though, so no real damage. Though she suspects they took out some coinage out of it. ^^

I was extremely happy to see them again, praying that this will be the end of our hardship. That we’d finally be together forever with no more goodbyes. Of course, nothing comes easy, and we knew we had plenty of paperwork ahead of us to make that happen.

Well it’s been almost 4 months since my VISA application was approved, but so far still nothing has happened; no papers have arrived anywhere and no one, not even the lawyer or the USCIS seem to have a clue as to why I am not in the USA yet.

We have called, written, emailed, called again and again but they’re just telling us the same thing over and over. “If after 30 days of notification you still haven’t gotten your papers, call again and we’ll resend.”. Then, of course, those 30 days pass yet again, and we have to wait yet another 30 days to be disappointed once again.

Obviously something somewhere has gone very very wrong and we are tired of waiting. The lawyer has even told my wife that someone else who applied in march was already there! They can’t figure out why I don’t have my VISA yet. Not like they seem to do a helluva lot to find out either though.

With the help of my dad and other family members we managed to get enough monies to get everything finished on my wife’s end, the bankruptcy and such, to get everything in order to do what we initially planned to do later. To fly them both here for what God willing will be a permanent residence.

Of course this whole ordeal is not without its own set of bumps and hiccups. I’ve tried to register our marriage here months ago but they wouldn’t let me. The local office (where I’m supposed to register) said I had to go to The Hague first but they told me the exact opposite. So that didn’t go anywhere. But now after many calls and inquiries I’ve finally managed to talk to people who actually have some knowledge about this topic.

Apparently it’s a bit more difficult than they first let on. You can’t just simply register, especially if your spouse is wanting to come live with you. We think we got most of it figured out though, and we (well, my wife mostly) have gotten the papers they told us we need to actually get this done. God I really hope there are no more nasty surprises, this is truly killing me deep inside.

Our one year anniversary is coming up very soon and I pray we will be truly together again before then. Right now our projected flight date is august 7th, which is soon, real soon. While I can’t wait and am nervous as hell I still can’t get excited too much until I actually have her in my arms again. I’ve simply been disappointed too many times in a row to start cheering prematurely.

So I guess it’ll be her being the alien, not me. I pray for a happy end.

A few things within the same theme:

As of two days ago Pluis and Stinky have a new home. Ever since my decision to leave for the Unites States my mother has taken in most of my cats. That made the total lot of cats go up to nine. These two in particular have always been the most ‘active’ ones. They were making some of the other cats nervous with their hectic behavior.

So this young couple contacted us a last week and wanted to take a look. They have a newborn child and want it to grow up with pets. They used to have a cat until recently, it died due to a heart condition. They seemed like very nice people and loving the kitties.

Pluis and Stinky are two very easygoing cats and not afraid of (new) people, social and playful. I’m sure they will do well there. The couple mentioned having a big garden so I know they’ll have fun in there. I’ll miss them though.

They say absence makes the heart go fonder. But if this takes any longer I fear my heart my just explode. I need to be home with my wife and kid, where I belong. Still no word from the embassy. We want a date, an approximate one at the very least. It’s been so long already and it is taking its toll on us. On both our physical and mental health.

I had my arm poked two days ago. The doctor that was in contact with us regarding my brother’s unfortunate passing, let us a know the results of his obduction few weeks ago. It wasn’t too far than what we were already told in the preliminary report.

He recommended that everyone in the immediate family should do a blood test for cholesterol because the possibly exists it is a genetic flaw. In which case we’ll have to pay more attention than usual on it. I should get the results very soon.

Cholesterol is a sneaky thing. Most people will think lightly about it and pay little mind on what they eat and do and how that affects their cholesterol. The fact that there’s barely, if any, noticeable symptoms go alongside with a too high cholesterol value. Until it’s too late that is.

There is a lot of misconception around it, such as the simplistic view that LDL=bad and HDL=good. Even a lot of tests only give you estimates and not an exact particle size measurement. For reference: a level of 5.2mmol/L or higher puts you in the borderline risk statistic, whereas a level of 6.2mmol/L or higher will make you an easy target for a stroke or heart attack.

A few days ago I stopped drinking sodas. It has been almost a week now. It’s not that I plan on giving it up altogether, but lately I was drinking a bit too many cans of Coke so I decided to stop for a while. Ever since I had my first sip of Mt. Dew it doesn’t really do anything for me anyway, I just want ‘The Dew’ which is hard to find here.

Ok, I wrote 11 new blog entries today which comprise about 3 months of events. This includes the passing of my brother and the service we held, as well as my wife and daughter’s first visit to the Netherlands when they meet the rest of the family for the very first time.

List of new blog entries, in chronological order:

• [2007/01/17] My brother passed away at the age of 36
• [2007/01/18] Saying goodbye..
• [2007/01/19] Making lifetime decisions with no time to think.
• [2007/01/22] The service was beautiful.
• [2007/02/04] The wait at the airport.
• [2007/02/04+05] They are really here!
• [2007/02/09] The beach
• [2007/02/15] It’s green..
• [2007/02/22] Bowl-O-Rama
• [2007/02/24] My baby flew away..
• Placement of the urn.

You can also find all of these in the new Mental Distress subcategory.

Note: These are ABRIDGED versions of the events, but as is my custom they are still very long. Also, several of them have pictures! They are currently only dated in the topic, to make my readers more aware of new entries, but I may move them to their proper dates sometime in the future.

There are tears on my pillow, both mine and yours. For today was the day we had to say goodbye once again, your 3 week visit had come to an end. A visit that was initially to be with me in my time of need, the grief I have over the loss of my brother, but as always you gave me so much more than merely support.

You gave me strength, hope, love, even joy, and everything else I wanted and needed. A smile when I woke up, the ability to hold you close whenever I desired (read: always), and a listening ear even if it meant waking you up in the middle of the night.

What you do for me, and TO me, is beyond words, it can only be felt or perhaps witnessed. Though I doubt anyone but us can truly understand what our relationship is like. It is the kind you only see in fantasies, or read about in romantic novels. It is divine. Our love, our devotion, our willingness, our openness, our honestly, our feelings, everything is simply perfect. Just as it should be. We are perfect for each other.

It was hard from the very second I had to let go of your hand an watch you leave towards your plane. And I know that it is going to get even harder for a while too. I stood at the gate for about half an hour, trying to make sure you actually made it past the checkpoints, and then I went to the upper area outside and watched your plane depart.

I have slept a little bit, your plane is scheduled to arrive at your first stop in about an hout. My heart is pounding. I need to hear your voice, I miss you so much. To lie down here in bed, without being able to feel your warmth, waking up just to see an empty spot next to mine, it hurts…

I need you…

(Click on the pictures for larger versions.)

Two days before my wife and kid were scheduled to depart once again to the USA we had a big bowling party in one of the nearby bowling alleys. A lot of family came with, for some this would be the last day they’d see her for a while.

I hadn’t bowled in years but I did remember always having a lot of fun trying, heh. I’ve heard my baby talk about it too so this would be something very fun to do. After much ordeal of finding the right size shoes (What’s with that anyway, those sizes don’t add up, I think I nearly went down 4 sizes!), and drinking our drinks we went to our lanes and started to roll over some pins.

We had loads of fun and I think I threw a strike once, I honestly don’t even remember. I know some of the other family members did really well! I’d love to bowl more often. It’s fun, and good exercise too!

We played several rounds, and although I got better with each round at the end, when they totalled all the scores, I had the lowest score of all the men. And Ellen had the lowest score for the women, heh. Too many gutterballs I guess. We got a prize though! ^_^

(Click on the pictures for larger versions.)

We’ve done a lot together over the past week my wife and daughter have been here, lots of shopping too, heh. Any excuse to show off my beloved! We also started on a big romantically themed jigsaw puzzle, but it turned out to be quite a difficult one. Almost half the pieces are simply a shade of pink!

We went to one of our nearby forests the other day too, Groenendaal, which also has a small petting zoo. Knowing they’d close early we went to that part first and say goats, ducks, a big ass pig, donkeys, and more. Lynda wanted to feed some of the goats, but as soon as they even think you have food you are swarmed. Sometimes they go as far as climbing all over you just to get the food. It’s funny when some lady has her 3 year old try that, heh.

Then we went into the woods, the ‘handyman’ came too. Though we call him that, and he does a lot of stuff for people, he’s not really all that handy. He means well though. This forest is pretty big, and there are several defined routes you can take, or choose to just wander. It is so pretty, it would’ve been even better if spring would’ve started but they would’ve been gone by then and I wanted them to see this.

In this particular forest they have lots of animals running around, though it can sometimes take a keen eye to find them. One of those animals is the Scottish Highlander, a big ox-like animal who are usually quite meek and friendly. I have petted some before, even by the head and horns, and I wanted my baby to do the same. So when we found one I urged her to get near it.

My wife, daughter and myself then started to approach the animal. It appeared to be eating some grass leaves or something. My wife was kinda scared but I assured her it was safe. But just as we were only a few inches away from it, he turned his head, pointed his horns toward us and started to charge!

OMG! Ruuuuun! He didn’t really follow us but he managed to rip off a button of my wife’s vest while she tried to push him away. (Yes, she actually put her hand on his face and tried to push it away when it came near.) He also scratched her shades that was in one of her pockets. Whew! That was close! Sorry baby, I did not think he would do that!

(Click on the pictures for larger versions.)

A few days after my wife and daughter’s arrival, we went to the beach. Specifically, we went to Sea Life. It is a museum-like place where you can walk around huge fishtanks to see the most unusual (and beautiful) fish in a recreation of their natural habitat. Ranging from big ass lobsters to tiny seahorsies, and from manta rays to sharks, this place has a lot of cool sea creatures to look at. Even piranhas!

Now I have to say I wasn’t too thrilled about going into some of those rooms, the lobsters I can’t even look at, I’ll just hold my baby real tight until we pass that area. The piranhas, although extremely fascinating, scare me. And that one room, where you go in a tunnel of air surrounded by oodles of creatures, including sharks and turtoises, was intimidating. Did I mention my fear of water?

I went through it all though, because I know my baby’s love for the sea and everything in it. After that we went for a short walk on the beach, next to the pier. She hadn’t even seen a coastline in so many years. The beach was riddled with shells, ours always is, and they just kept on picking up more and more!

There’s this big boulevard paralel of the beach, and though most of it wasn’t open yet (off season) we could go inside the mini ‘mall’ area and look around the various shops. They have neat things there, though not always very affordable. We eventually headed for the arcade and tried a few games. We played air hockey for a while, I love that game. I went against my wife, she went against our daughter, who in turn went against mom. I don’t really remember the scores, but that’s not important because I remember having fun.

Time for one more game? Of course! You can’t go into an arcade and not play at least one round of House of the Dead! I think they had 2, 3, and 4 there. So my wife and I tried our hand at 4. We got a lot further than we thought we would, but died at the hand/teeth of some boss creature in the tunnels. It was neat, I love those games.. I love arcades!

(Click on the pictures for larger versions.)